Opinions: Warcraft

Due to my job I had received a free two admission pass to an advanced screening of Warcraft. You might be wondering why I’m just now writing about this movie, and the easy excuse would be, “because I work”, but the actual answer is, “because I’m lazy, and kind of wanted to sit on my opinion”. I was sitting in the movie theater with my friend and we were talking about the game Warcraft, which I knew nothing about. I kind of know about World of Warcraft from a former roommate who would sit in his room and play the game, never really leaving the room except for the occasional walk downstairs to receive food he had delivered (once every day). My friend knew a bit, but it was surface level and not nearly enough for us to be prepared for this movie. I had wondered if this would be like watching a superhero movie for a comic I’d never read sort of like Guardians of the Galaxy, not for the sake of the feel of it all, but just the point that I’d be in the dark. Unlike that Marvel movie, I had concluded that this movie would be trash. I made jokes about it being trash. I had told friends and family that I was going to a trash movie, and boy was I wrong…kind of. The movie was okay. I didn’t like it. I’ll never like it, but I can’t say that it’s trash. I’ll talk about the story in points of story and visuals where I’ll talk about what I like and didn’t like about this movie, but first I’ll point out that I watched this movie in 3D and I’ll never like 3D. It’s just so stupid. Anyways…

Story

Did you play the Warcraft games? Neither did I! Will you understand anything without the knowledge of aforementioned games? No! Not at all! Usually when it comes to stories with sci-fi or fantasy settings I’ll complain about the narrative and characters taking a back seat for sake of world building, but with this movie actual world building was needed. I mean… I was lost for the first few scenes, I didn’t know the relations between dwarves, elves, and humans. I didn’t know why our main character was where he was etc. The movie sort of just name drops shit and acts like you should know. I mean if you didn’t know what Dragon Ball Z was and I said, “Hey who do ya think is stronger at this point in Dragon Ball Super, Gohan or Future Trunks?” You’d ask why I said Future Trunks, why there was a Future Trunks, and who the hell is Gohan. Going through this movie is sort of like that at times.

Also… here’s the trailer to the movie.

Did this movie make you think that the Orcs and the humans were going to become allies and face a common enemy? I kind of thought so too. And then I watched the movie. And then the movie proved me wrong. The (good) orcs and the humans had a common enemy, but they never really allied together, that thought was nixed mid movie. The movie kind of just has the two separate parties attack the common enemy at different points and both parties get wrecked. Main orc dies. Human king dies. Main orc allies die. And the movie also pulls off dramatic irony at the end that kind of pisses me off and in order to talk about that part let me back track and talk about the romance in this movie–yes, there is romance in this movie. Who woulda thought?

Did you want to see orc love? Neither did I, but the romance between the main orc and his wife was pretty good. The movie showed that well. It felt genuine. I had zero problems with that.

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This is my problem.

So… this movie is a fantasy movie based off a video game aimed at young adults (but let’s not kid ourselves, it’s mainly young men). The thing that’s sometimes infuriating about fantasy video game movies is that they usually provide nerd wish fulfillment. Many of these movies and shows do that and it gets on my nerves (I’m looking at you Sword Art Online. And I’m not looking at you at all KonoSuba).

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Mmmm. KonoSuba, you were much better than you should have been.

Warcraft has its nice dose of nerd wish fulfillment by making main human romantically involved with half orc woman (you’ve noticed now that I’m not calling any of the characters by their names–I refuse to). This romance is brought up for no reason. There’s no real development. It’s like they meet and boom! She’s in love with him. He’s okay with her. They’re kissing, and there was no reason for that besides giving the audience a romance to look at as they project themselves onto the main human guy. Actually there isn’t really any development for any of these characters and the movie tries to use death to draw out emotions, but we’re not tied enough to characters to care i.e. when main human guy’s son dies. I watched that seen and went, “Okay? We’re using the son to fuel motivation? What about the point that the orcs are just a threat?” The deaths in this movie are kind of useless and the kills seem to happen just for the sake of shits and giggles.

After the case of nerd wish fulfillment there’s a moment where the king tells half orc woman to kill him so that she can get out of the battle (which made sense, but came out of nowhere, and was sort of stupid of the king). Main human dude shows up late and all he sees is his non deserved love interest standing over his dead brother (oh, did I mention that the king and main dude are bros either by blood or marriage). So then we have to play with the point that there will now be a misunderstanding for the next movie, because that plot line doesn’t get resolved in this one. This movie pissed me off on a lot of levels. But if you enjoy light humor and action, it’s great for surface level watching…except the fight between main human dude and secondary villain orc. It was like they ran out of budget or the choreographer ran out of ideas and just said, “Sliding slice. One move. That’ll entertain em”, but it didn’t.

Visuals

This’ll be quick. The visuals for the most part were pretty great. The scenery and most of the effects were awesome, but there’s something about magic–there’s always something about magic. I don’t care if it’s in CW superhero shows or blockbusters, magic always looks iffy. The magic effects reminded me of a bad Syfy movie. It just looks like conspicuous blue, green, and purple light effects that shouldn’t be natural. I don’t know when we’ll be able to present magic in an aesthetically pleasing way. Maybe Doctor Strange’ll get it right?

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The magic reminds me of Dragonball: Evolution in a bad way, which is redundant because you can only think of Dragonball: Evolution in a bad way. 

Overall, I personally hated this movie. You can tell from my words that I hated this movie. Actually this article doesn’t really say anything positive about this movie, but objectively it was good. The casting, sans the Guardian, was good. The premise was interesting. Action scenes and visuals were okay. And the movie is blowing up overseas. This movie is a great summer action flick if you just wanna watch without a care. Unfortunately it just wasn’t for me.

Side note: At the end, this movie sets up for a sequel. And that pisses me off! At least close some fucking plot lines! Jeez. But no really. Objectively this movie is pretty good.

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